Depression for many is part of working through the bereavement process. It can take so many forms and have some surprising symptoms. It does get easier in time, but it is hard to believe that when you are in the depths of it. When I have lost loved ones, I got quite impatient with people that told me that time heals. It was as if they didn't understand how real it is to me at the time. Having been through several major bereavements in recent years, I did find that time did heal though. I also found that bereavement got a little easier to deal with after I had been through it a few times.
The pain of loss is inevitable, I believe, if you love someone. Any amount of practise or faith won't change that. Not being able to reach out and physically touch and hug your loved one is a very painful experience. It's so hard to understand too. Somehow it doesn't make sense. I have found that some of the symptoms of bereavement can be very much helped by understanding what death is and what lies beyond death. That's what bereavement rescue is all about.
Having done the research and learned about these things, Rod and I want to share what we have learned so that other people can suffer less with bereavement. We have no wish to hold up a pretty picture that will make you feel better, because we know people aren't daft and that these things are not effective if they are not believable. What we want to share is not based on fantasies and hopes, but the findings of medical and scientific studies undertaken by professional scientists.
Our site doesn't have a lot of the information that we want to share yet. We will be working on getting it up here. Meanwhile, we would like to give an outline here...
The study of Near Death Experiences involves collection and analysis of reports of people who have died (often under medical supervision so there is no question of whether death actually occurred) and come back to life. Many people will tell you "dead people don't come back to life". This isn't true. With the advances in modern medical resuscitation, between 2% and 20% of cardiac arrest victims do return to life as a result of resuscitation. Many of these people come back and tell of marvellous experiences and of meeting loved ones.
The reports are strikingly similar and consistent worldwide, across all faiths and cultures. There are varying degrees of Near Death Experience (which is measured on the Greyson scale). Some people find their consciousness just leaves their body and looks down and observes medical staff working on them. Some people's consciousness leaves the room and floats up outside the building and can report on conversations that relatives in distant locations are having. These conversations are verified word for word (e.g. the case of Betty Eddie). Some Near Death Experiences are classified as "Deep Core". These take the consciousness into spiritual realms where they meet pre-deceased loved ones.
Being an animal lover myself, I was delighted to hear of a man who was greeted by all his dogs running towards him. Most people report being greeted by family and human loved ones though. These Near Death witnesses describe an atmosphere of fantastic reunion. I don't think anyone who has died and comes back is ever concerned about the welfare of a loved one who dies. Having been there themselves, albeit temporarily, they know their loved ones have gone somewhere absolutely wonderful where there is no pain, no illness, no stress, no unhappiness. It is just perfection. That's where your loved ones have gone. Once you understand that and have studied the evidence and found yourself convinced, you will feel happy knowing that you're only temporarily parted from your loved one and they will be waiting there to greet you on your passing.
No matter how unexpected or traumatic the passing of a loved one is, everything that we know from Near Death research and those that have come back tells us that there is a perfect time for each one of us to pass over. Many people who have deep core Near Death Experiences have conversations with Jesus/God/a Light. Something that many come back and tell us is that they were told that there are no mistakes. Howard Storm had a deep core NDE and one of the things he was told by Jesus was "We don't make mistakes". Of course, it is hard for us to understand that on Earth. It is very hard to accept that it could possibly be anything but a mistake when we see a loved one suffer, die traumatically or die younger than we would hope. But NDEs assure us that, when we get up to Heaven, our mind will open up and we will understand everything perfectly.
Once you accept that notion, it makes it easier even whilst here on Earth to find some way of understanding and accepting things that would otherwise be almost impossible to understand. One man, who had been clinically dead for a number of hours who came back to life whilst laying naked in a mortuary, had lost both of us parents tragically whilst he was a baby. Whilst in the presence of Jesus, it was explained to him the reason it had happened. When being interviewed on the television, he laced his fingers together and said "it all fitted perfectly and I understood anything. I said 'Of course!'". On returning to his body, he was left with the knowledge that he had been given the answer to losing both of his parents tragically, but the actual reason had been taken from him again.
A similar example of someone being given understanding whilst in Heaven, but having that memory wiped before returning to her Earthly body, was Betty Eddie. She was shown her mission in life, but told that when she went back she wouldn't remember it because she would rush it if she knew and the timing would be wrong.
This leads us to realise that each of us does in fact have a mission in Life. We are here for a reason, even though it is rare that anyone really knows their personal reason and mission. I personally believe we each have a list of missions and jobs to achieve, spiritual gigs to play, and when we have completed all of these, that is when we go home to be with our loved ones.I love life, but I am looking forward to what lies beyond. I can't wait to see my loved ones again! I hope this gives you some idea of what we want to share. I hope it also gives you some hope, a bit of light at a dark time for you. If you would like to learn more, please feel free to contact us directly. Our service is totally free. We just like to help. Here are some websites and books you could explore to learn more about Near Death Experience:
I hope this helps someone. Remember - you are not alone!
Dr Caroline Wilkins
We would be very grateful if you would consider donating to the Bereavement Rescue Centre Appeal. We are now at a stage with the Bereavement Rescue Centre project where we must pay for various services relating to the Planning Permission process (Ecological Surveys, Architect drawings and Planning Application fees). We expect to have to raise at least £1200 in order to get through planning before we can apply for a grant to enable the building of the Centre.